From Pre-Pandemic, Through Shut-Down … For?

FROM which:

At the start of the pandemic I attended 4 x 2hour sessions and filled the Branch Treasurer role, committing 12 hours a week.

In hindsight, none of this time was directed towards the organisation nor my own development. Hence my journey reflects on ‘for’ rather than the more usual destination of ‘to’.

THROUGH which:

The pandemic stripped away all sessions and responsibilities at a stroke, and, like having a stroke, I needed to establish new connections in order to function.

I redirected my 12 hours to the local community as a volunteer at the local hospital. An opportunity for engaging with people outside of my own self-importance. This drip-fed my understanding of myself and of what support is needed to keep an organisation strong. I felt that all of this was, somehow, his teachings too. It sharpened my focus.

FOR which:

Pre-pandemic I was giving a little but had taken so much. As sessions were suspended I saw so many members withdraw their support. I saw myself in their actions. I began to recognise that classes weren’t set up through my efforts and for myself… a typical ‘I thought I was (or wasn’t)’ moment.

The people, myself, weren’t important. None of us will last. What is important is the organisation that Master Moy created. Its structure, and its roots are what holds the body together. Everything has a unique purpose and needs no adjustment nor physical effort by me.

I need no knowledge, no understanding nor any wisdom. All of this is built into the body. I just need to trust its structure, to sink into it and, with diligent practise (the ease of arts, of form, of admin and of life) to grow strong, to feel and appreciate the connections, the flow and the harmony.

I need to be a rootlet that keeps the organisation growing so that it is there in the future for others yet to come. Not only do I need personal practice, I need to practice being a person, a contributor, a servitor.

Instead of being proud of what I know, I will acknowledge that it is all I know – I am opening to the growing I’ve yet to achieve. I’m feeling stronger.